This morning on the way to school Jane said, “I’ll be a unicorn someday.”
I nodded. It’s a solid plan for a three year old.
“But I’m going to have a lady face,” she added.
Again, solid plan. Who doesn’t like a unicorn with a pretty face?
“And then I’ll lose my tooths,” she stated, poking her front teeth with her finger.
This is the part of the conversation where things started to go off the rails a bit.
“No, you won’t lose your teeth for a long time,” I tried to explain, but she wasn’t having it.
“I will!” she insisted vehemently. “I will lose my tooths, and then steal other little girls’ tooths.”
“I thought you were going to a be a lady face unicorn,” I asked. I couldn’t help it.
She considered this, and agreed, “Yes, I will. And I will steal other unicorns’ tooths.”
“It’s teeth. It’s plural,” I said, because frankly, I was at a loss for how to respond anymore and it seemed safest to stick to immovable facts.
“Yes. Teeth. And I will steal them, and hide them in my stove, and cook them later,” she nodded, apparently satisfied that we’d reached a mutual grammar agreement and an understanding about the fate of any future teeth that fall into her hands.
“Hey, look at those birds up there,” I pointed to a really timely and convenient flock flying over the freeway.
She smiled silently and watched them.
SCORE. I’d managed to stop the lady-face-unicorn-teeth-cooking conversation in its tracks with a simple diversionary “hey look at that over there” tactic.
She kept smiling sweetly, gazing up at the birds, and then I heard her whisper, “Hey little birds, I can see your tooths.”
And a little bit frightening.
Just like all the other women who surround me in life.
But would I have it any other way? Nope. I love strong women. I love outspoken, creative, sometimes inappropriate, hilarious, authentic women. I’ve been really lucky to have lots of them around me, in my family, and in my circle of friends. My Jane has all of those attributes in spades, and if that means I have to discuss strange unicorns with an obsession for culinary teeth experiments, so be it.
And speaking of women I’m lucky enough to have in my life, check out my friend Tami singing a beautiful song, with her beautiful voice, and the hilarious mom-kid interruption that happens midway through. Adorable. Adorable Adorable. Motherhood is hard, and challenging, and sometimes a little frightening. Just like teeth-stealing unicorns with human faces. But it’s so, very, very, very worth it…