Cajun’s Made Me Stop Being a Hermit. Which is Basically Like a Christmas Miracle.

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On the weekends where I don’t have Jane, I tend to hide. It’s not necessarily a bad thing. I grocery shop wearing sunglasses. I clean the apartment from top to bottom. I even find myself scrubbing that little space back behind the toilets, that’s how I know I’ve really crossed over into the hooded Emperor “join me Luke” dark side of cleaning.

It’s nice to have time to catch up on life every two weeks. I don’t take that for granted. I pay bills. I do laundry. I fill the freezer up with meals for the next century.  I check the air in my tires (I know how to do this now *high fives myself*).

But sometimes I hide not just because it’s nice to get things done, or to rest, but because I’m sad. Her room is empty. I miss her. And this is a small town. It wouldn’t seem like it when you look at the population count, but somehow it is. Gossip is a much favored past time, and it is just exhausting. And truthfully, it makes me want to simultaneously fight someone and hide at the same time. So I pick hiding because it’s a choice much less likely to involve bail money. I KID.

So this past weekend one of my bestest friends in all the world drug me out into said world. Jeanetta came over, brought me firewood,and drove us to a blogger’s Christmas event at Cajun’s Wharf this past Saturday and I have to admit, I wasn’t excited about it. Don’t get me wrong. I love that restaurant. And I was happy to see my friend (because it’s impossible not to miss that big haired opinionated woman something awful when I don’t see her for over a month). But I knew I’d also be seeing a lot of people I hadn’t seen since before the divorce. People who had heard all those gossipy things, and this was one of those cases where it seemed a heck of a lot easier to stay at home and scrub the bath tubs with bleach.

But I went.

I could get a little teary eyed if I let myself, because this was the first time I’ve ventured out into the world since it fell of its axis, and nothing bad was waiting for me. It was actually wonderful. The women were wonderful. The food was wonderful. The booze was, well, I think these pictures speak for themselves.  We drank, we ate, we laughed a lot. Jeanetta made a crown out of the table’s rosemary garnishes. The owner taught us how to make mussels and clams in a tomato broth that was to die for. I had a Christmas martini called the Poinsettia, but it should have been called “I make everyone in your life funnier.”

I was reminded that it’s safe to go out. There was no big gossip monster waiting for me. There were no awkward moments. But there were a lot of hugs and “good to see you out’s” and genuine smiles.

I was reminded that it’s safe to stop cleaning and put on some high heels and venture into the world again.

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9 Comments

  1. vanessa says:

    Please find an excuse to visit NWA and we’ll hit up the town(s) with coffee and non stop flea market window shopping. I literally know almost no one here, so it’s fabulous when I’m feeling incognito. ; ) Which is very often.

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  2. I am so sad I was not able to be there, meet you and hug your neck. Those ARWB gals are pretty welcoming, kind, and loving. No judgement around here sistah! Get out and live your life, it is going to be amazing!

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  3. erniebufflo says:

    I want you and Jane to come to one of my meatball parties sometime. Will ping you in January (skipping December to celebrate my 30th birthday, though I’d love for you to come to that too, because even though we’ve only met in person a couple of times, I like you and would love to hang out). Also: I live in this small town and have heard ZERO, so, no anxiety about seeing me, either!

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  4. Jeanetta says:

    Ok now, your hair was rather big that day too and we might be neck and neck on who’s more opinionated. lol Love you girl and glad that I’m a good kind of pushy. Actually i think i’m just persistent. Wore you down 🙂

    Like

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